An End-of-Quarter/Thanksgiving Weekend Reflection

Ah, finally. The quarter is nearing its close and I'm nothing if not relieved.

When I think about it though, I'm grateful as well. School is wonderful. It's hard work (when the work actually gets done), but it's sooo much better than some of the bleaker options out there.

I was reminded over the weekend of why I chose to come back to school, having graduated and all.

Yes. I got my old job back at Toys R Us for the holidays. Toys R Us was the only job I could manage to find when I moved home after graduating in 2004. Pathetic, isn't it? I blame myself, somewhat...mostly, actually. I could have worked much harder to find a job. I should have been working on it for months. I should have been working period.

So I worked at Toys R Us on Friday (I still have a bit of a twitch) and Saturday.

This made me thankful (appropiately) for a few things. I'm incredibly thankful that I'm back in school working towards something. I'm also thankful that I kind of have my shit together and actually care that I'm back in school and goddammit if I don't get a job, a real job, when this is over. I am not going to do the whole struggling-to-survive-working-two-jobs thing. I have a degree. Shouldn't that count for something? Shouldn't people who struggle and throw themselves into debt be rewarded with something?

Now, I'm not saying someone should just hand me a job when this is all over (though it would be nice). I know I will have to look and "hit the pavement" and all that crap, but I'm going to actually do it this time. Because the next time I go to school it isn't going to be to escape a mediocre life, it's going to be for career.

So anyway...

It's not over yet, but seeing as I don't have any finals (I have no idea how that happened, but it's probably got something to do with taking all English classes) I'm kind of relaxing, anxiously waiting for Friday.

Gentle Readers,

For my third installment, I will continue to discuss my inner-nerd. I would like to revisit the relevance of community.

As I discussed previously, the Internet provides a haven for groups of people who are aligned with specific groups or people, namely couples. In my case, BuckinghamNicks.net and the now defunct listserv “BuckinghamsGirlz” (we were fourteen!) have greatly enhanced my fandom. Let me put it this way: Would you want to go to a Star Wars convention all alone? Would you want to mill around with a big group of…Storm Troopers and not really know or talk to any of them? Of course not.

Knowing that you are not the only one out there is a good enough feeling. Knowing that and knowing the other “ones” is even better. If it were not for BuckinghamNicks.net and its creator, Nancy, I would not have had a group of girls to pal around with in downtown Cincinnati, hoping for a Fleetwood Mac spotting. Nor would I know that the reason we were hanging around downtown was because during The Dance tour in 1997, Stevie serenaded Lindsey at the bar in The Cincinnattian Hotel. I also would not have had a bootlegged copy of a former show to listen to on the drive there and back.


*Thanks for the memories, Nancy!

The fact of the matter is, for all of my complaints about technology, the Internet, etc. in this blog there really are some good, albeit superficial points about it. When I was fourteen and watching Fleetwood Mac for the first time on PBS, I never would have expected to be as “into” them as I am today. I never would be without the likes of this computer.


*Happier Times; my favorite photo of Stevie Nicks and Lindsey Buckingham

Gentle readers,

In my last installment, I discussed the beginning of my fandom. I told you where the magic happened and how it has evolved over the years. I also began discussing how the Internet has given me a community, to nurture my fandom with others of like minds. Now I would like to look at another way in which the Internet has robbed me of my hard-earned money in trade for a night of pure bliss.

Technology also assists fans in the actual viewing of concerts. As I was strolling through my fine campus quad the other day I began thinking about concert-going. I wondered how things might be if the Internet had not been created (please refrain from any Al Gore jokes). Would people still camp out in front of venues to get the best seats…? And in a non-ironic way? (e.g. the girls who still camp out for Hanson). I know I would certainly sleep on the pavement for a solid three days to get a good seat at a Fleetwood Mac show. I think I might actually prefer it to the way I got my ticket for the August 2003 show in Cincinnati.

I went to the May 2003 show in Columbus, their first show in support of the album Say You Will. I was at the Ticketmaster website a good half an hour before the pre-sale began with my magic password in hand and I still only got row twenty on the floor. I decided I wanted no more of that and decided my next show would be through a broker. I saved all summer and when the time came I put down more money than I spend on rent for a third row seat.


*This would be my ticket. Don't let the sticker price fool you!

Readers, you must believe me when I say it was worth every penny. That may sound cliché, but that is regardless to the fact that I was within a foot of Lindsey Buckingham and his sweaty guitar.


*Need I say more?

Though it may be wrong, the experience would not have been possible without a broker or for that matter, crazy people like me who support them for the worthwhile cause of knowing what's best for two people who really should know it themselves.


*A picture that would be much better without the hand in front of Stevie's face

Gentle Readers,

I want to tell you a story. In the beginning, I intended on telling you all about Stevie Nicks and Lindsey Buckingham (I will say this only once, Lindsey is a man!), but realized that maybe that would not be so interesting to anyone outside of my Buckingham Nicks bubble. I still wanted to incorporate them into my essay, however, but have decided to focus a little more on what technology does to enhance the experience. So without further adieu, let me begin.

I was fourteen years old when I fell in love. Alright, I didn’t actually fall in love, but something inside of me was intrigued. It was a school night and I was flipping through the stations on my tiny bedroom television. I stopped when I saw Stevie Nicks. At the time, I had no appreciation for classic rock nor the woman singing. I knew who she was, but I had never heard her sing in a way that made me stop what I was doing and pay attention. It was 1997 and Fleetwood Mac had just reunited after a ten year separation. The song was “Silver Springs,” and the man she was screaming at was Lindsey Buckingham.


*Seen here, Lindsey being sung to by Stevie

It didn’t take long, after that night, for me to nurture my new obsession. It was something I was good at. In my later years of elementary school, I became fascinated with a soap opera couple on General Hospital and dedicated my life to seeing that they stayed together, despite their fictitious state of being. I outgrew that soon and replaced Kevin and Lucy with another fictional “couple,” The X-Files’ Mulder and Scully. Soon enough I found my real deal in Stevie Nicks and Lindsey Buckingham, a former couple with enough chemistry to stop a fourteen-year old girl from getting her full eight hours of rest. I wish I could pinpoint what exactly drew me to these people, but I guess like any stereotypical female, I just like a good love story.


*This is an image from the inner cover of Stevie Nicks' and Lindsey Buckingham's first and only album together

Around the time that I became enamored with Mulder and Scully (1995), my family had hooked up the Internet. I discovered that this was a great source for “shippers” such as myself. A “shipper,” short for “relationshipper” is any fan of any couple who either supports or hopes for a particular union—these can range from SpongeBob and Patrick to Ross and Rachel. These groups are mostly made up of single women, though it depends on the “fandom.” For example, the Buckingham Nicks shippers are generally women, but the ratio of single to married is relatively even. This was not concluded scientifically, however, and I am basing this off of the group of people I associate with in a forum.

Most “shippers” find a haven on the Internet that keeps busiest, in the case of Buckingham Nicks, during tours or post-album release. At these times, message boards are full of information and speculation from each show and song, as all members are encouraged to write reviews and add input to song speculation pages. One can easily find a number of threads with titles such as “One kiss or two?” “Three Kisses on the LIPS” or “Proof that they still love each other.” Sites such as BuckinghamNicks.net make it extremely easy to get caught up in the gossip and keep the speculation going. There is a very strong community aspect and several people have become very good friends through being “shippers” with a place to convene which would not exist without the help of technology.


*A much speculated on picture taken in Germany around the time Stevie was finding out Lindsey had knocked up another lady. Part of a series.

Toootally should've listened to the Professor and had this essay done on Wednesday. Toootally.

I made the mistake of getting my old job back at Toys R Us. So I worked 9 hours on Friday and like, 4 hours on Saturday and yeah, that sucked.

It's been pretty crazy busy around here. We had the annual Gerig Family Slideshow on Saturday evening and that was fun. My mom has her brothers and sisters over and we all watch slides that my grandpa took. It's kind of boring because my brothers and I have no idea waht's going on, but it's fun to get everyone together and see everyone looking so young.

After everyone left my brother, his fiancee, my boyfriend and myself looked at slides from when my brother and I were kids. Hahahhaaaa. Torture. Kidding.

So I'm hoping to wrap this essay up soon so I can go sit in traffic for a while and get home to CBus before sunrise.

My brain feels like it's been on a frying pan for a few hours.

I have a chapter summary and a non-fiction essay due tomorrow and I can't seem to produce anything worth reading. I don't know if it's "end-of-the-quarter-blahs" or lack of sleep. Or if my brain is simply not cooperating. Whatever it is, it's pissing me off.

I've been thinking about this essay for a week. I finally sat down a night or two ago and everything I wrote just sucked, for lack of a better term. I've started four different stories now and I know that all of them are complete crap. My first two essays came out just fine. I sat down, I wrote them, and I knew they were okay. I know when I have to force something out it isn't going to be pretty. Which sucks. Because my first two workshops have gone so well. And now, it won't.

I know I could take the easy way out. We're allowed to turn in a revision of one of our essays and I could do that. But...I don't want to cop out. And I really don't have that much to revise.

The boyfriend might be coming down early, possibly even tonight. So I'm trying to get all of this done now, but I don't want to forsake quality. I almost don't want him to come down tonight so I can just work on my essay most of the night. But even if he doesn't come, there's no guarantee that anything will happen to inspire me. More than likely I'd sit in front of a blank screen and smoke a pack of cigarettes.

I know I should just try to clear my head---go for a freezing walk, work on some knitting---but now I feel like I'm in competition with some invisible force not allowing me to write. Like...something won't let me do this and that's not going to happen. I'm going to write and it's going to be good, dammit.

Blarg.

So, I didn't really get anything done over the weekend. Between wanting to spend every possible minute with the boyfriend and my family's busy schedules, I'm lucky if I can take a shower.

It's strange being in a house filled with the "latest" technologies, yet hardly experiencing any of it. Undoubtedly I will see some sort of sporting event on the television--be it by choice or not. I never even see the computer when I'm there. By the time I'd get around to using it, I'm sure I'd have to fight someone for it anyway. And I don't care.

I do think I am, however, beginning to see the benefits to having a digital camera. Of course this would be in addition to a manual, but I'm starting to seriously consider this investment.

Example? This weekend I went home to go to a wedding. Here I am posting in my blog about this experience and thinking it might be nice to include some images to go along with it. Instead, any images I do have are being held hostage in my 35mm. And I'm not about to waste the film just so I can have my half dozen snapshots, which I would then have to scan anyway.

It is fun though, to take in a roll of film, anticipating the birth of concrete images. Oh, I forgot about that! It's fun to go back and remember instead of seeing the images instantly, glossing over the moment. Then again, there's also the What the hell is that? Is that your back? The inside of my purse? It could go either way, really.

What I'd really like to do is re-learn the whole photography process. I took photography my senior year of high school at a local community college and I haven't stepped foot in a darkroom since. I think I want to have a darkroom when I buy a house. My dad used to have one at our old home, but once the kids came he stopped doing that. Now there's a good feeling. Getting all the stops right, taking a great picture, not screwing up the chemicals or the film, and getting an image knowing you were part of the process from beginning to end. Certainly more time consuming, but probably most rewarding.

Anyway, the moral of the story is; technology might not be so bad, convenient even. It's all a question of how it is used. In terms of a digital camera--Is it adding to the disposable nature of our society or is it beneficial in the sense that it's cutting down on waste, giving us more options? As I do with everything, am I simply overthinking something that is really just a simple option? Isn't that the beauty of blogging?

I have been mulling over ideas for my blog essay.

At first I thought I might do something involving long-distance relationships. Oh, barf, I know. I am interested in "researching" them because they intrigue me and of course, it's personally relevant. But then I thought...I'd have to interview my boyfriend or something. In which case he'd know that I'm doing a blog essay on long-distance relationships. I mean, he knows I'm a geek, but come on! Also...I don't know if it's really that interesting.

So then I was thinking perhaps I could focus on teenagers and the Internet. I realize that sounds completely 1995, but I am interested in knowing what the kids are up to these days. Do most of them use the Internet for mostly communicative purposes or something different, such as downloading or pornography (kidding, but not really).

This could be good because I have to go home for a wedding this weekend, in which case I could interview my spritely young brother, whom at the age of 15 is nearly a foot taller than myself.

See....



Not the greatest picture, but what can you do?

Anyway, his snotty friends are always at our house, so I could talk to them as well. Of course...I'd have to find some sort of recording device, but I know my dad has a video camera. And I don't think anyone's parents would be opposed to it. Since most of them are neighborhood kids, that would be easy enough.

So I might do that. Of course it will be last minute and all, but isn't that fun of it?

Is honesty really the best policy?

I was thinking about this the other night. I went out with a group of people to Martini. I've been trying to watch my money so I kept it light and the bill wasn't outstanding. Everyone was antsy to leave for happy hour at B. Hampton's, which I did not attend. While the checks were being passed out and everyone was quickly signing, I noticed my card hadn't been run through. The receipt was there, but there was no evidence of my numbers or a slip to sign.

My first thought was "FREE MEAL." I mean, how overpriced is a Cameron Mitchell restaurant? Should I really pay $9 for a tiny plate of butternut squash ravioli? Does Cameron Mitchell give back to the community? Is he a Republican? I thought of these factors a bit before flagging our server down to let him know.

He thanked me for my honesty and I cursed myself. The possibility of me ever going there again are slight. And would anyone remember? Stupid parents and their guilt trips! I could just hear them in the back of my mind shaming my dishonesty. It was the same way whenever I stole something. It was a rush, but at the same time I just couldn't enjoy it. No matter how disgusting of a corporation it was, I could never feel good about stealing. At least not usually anyway.

So...Is honesty the best policy? I don't know. Karmically speaking, yes. In Tom Morris' Business as Unusual he claims dishonesty is one of the biggest detriments to our society because it causes a lack of trust. Trust, of course, being essential and all. On the other hand, from a completely selfish point of view, honesty is crap. It doesn't always get what you want. Even if you do feel better about yourself...in that smug, self-satisfying way.

This question is difficult. It would help if I had some sort of guidelines by which I live. I mean, I do in some respects. I know what I believe. I think I know what I want. It's just not as cut and dry as following some sort of religion's rules. I just have to figure out what really is important to be a good person, to lead a satisfying and happy life.

Gentle Readers, in my final address on what constitutes a good blog, I will briefly discuss relativity. This choice may seem obvious—of course a blog must be relative to sustain readership—but perhaps not. Would Pink is the New Blog be successful if it discussed celebrity gossip from a month ago? No. If someone in charge of writing a blog dedicated to celebrity gossip sincerely wrote, “Did you hear Brad and Jen split?” Their credibility level would be in the negatives.

There is, however, some room for a blogger to go off course in terms of relativity, but it is really only effective if it is done for comedic or satirical purposes, as with Jackie Harvey’s “Harveywood!” If “he” wants to call Pierce Brosnan, “Pierce Bronson” he can get away with it because the audience knows the blog is a satire. [Source]

Other than that a blog pertaining to pop culture should stay on top of the latest news. If George Thomas wants to write about a movie he saw last year, that’s fine, but if he wants his audience to continue reading, it would be in his best interest to discuss current affairs. His latest entry focuses on SAW II, a movie that opened last weekend. His opinion, that this is one of the worst movies ever created, may not be popular considering it was the number one movie at the box office, but that is how one stays relative. An opinion regarding a “hot topic” is pertinent in this field. [Source]